The Last Laugh
by Artful Doodler
Summary: Lunchtimes weren't about lumpy mashed spuds for Zoe London. They were about hiding from the class bullies. But one day, all that changed... Set in an AU.


"Urgh! Eggie's breath stinks again!"

"Yeah, urgh! God, she stinks!"

"Get away from us, you minger!"

Zoe London ate her sandwiches with her head down, trying to ignore the comments. She was close to tears but she knew crying would just make things worse. Melissa Allbright, Rachel Grecian and Kirsty Slassor – her so-called friends – would have to do a lot more to make her humiliate herself totally in public. Biting the inside of her mouth until the blood came; she tried to smile at them weakly. What else could she do? She had to pretend they weren't getting to her.

"Eggie stinks so much that she even agrees!" Melissa sneered.

"Yeah, look at her trying to get in on the joke!"

"Come on girls; let's go before Eggie kills us with her stench!"

The trio left the canteen to stalk the football pitch, cackling together like a coven of witches. Zoe watched as they stopped for a bit of a flirt with the school footie team. And there, in the centre of the gang, was Dan Morgan. The most popular boy in the year. Zoe's heart did a flip-flop at his Hollywood good looks as a smile spread slowly across his face.

"Hey! Dan!" Melissa shouted across the yard. "Sad Eggie London fancies you, you know!" The football team started jeering.

"Get in there, Danny Boy!" someone teased.

The girls collapsed into fits of giggles. Zoe went the colour of Phil Mitchell mid-strop. She couldn't believe it. Her crush on Dan was supposed to be a secret – now they'd told him she'd be a laughing stock.

xxoOoxx

Zoe wondered how she'd ever come to be friends with 'the three witches' in the first place. They'd all been in the same classes since the age of ten, but just recently things had changed – and so had they. Melissa had started her period, and not long after, Rachel and Kirsty got theirs. Zoe was still waiting. The boys twanged their bra straps and whistled as they passed. Especially Dan Morgan's gang, which made Zoe feel sick with jealousy.

Zoe knew Dan a bit because he lived in the same road. They used to play football together in the street, but now it seemed as if only the pretty girls were important to him. These days, she'd walk past him with her head down, her stomach fluttering with shyness and embarrassment. What chance would she have with such a love-god? How could she complete with Melissa's long brown hair, Rachel's Jordan-sized boobs, and Kirsty's so-hip-it-hurts wardrobe?

"Don't worry love, it'll happen in time," her mum had tried to reassure her. "Becoming a woman has its problems, you know. Enjoy this time while you've got it."

But what did her mum know? She'd probably forgotten how hard it was growing up. Zoe would give anything to go bra shopping, not that she had anything to put in it, or to shave her legs. Yet despite serious checking for hairs, Zoe was still waiting. It was hopeless. Sighing sadly, she hugged her books to her flatter-than-an ironing board chest and began walking home alone.

xxoOoxx

"Hey, stinky!" came the cry.

It was nothing new, but Zoe felt her stomach sink.

_What now?_ she thought. The last lesson of the day had just finished and the entire class was now witnessing Kirsty's teasing. Realizing she was the centre of attention, Kirsty began to talk even louder.

"Hey! Eggie! Are you deaf as well as rancid?" she demanded.

"Pardon?" Zoe replied weakly.

"It's no wonder you don't have a fella. You stink and your boobs are like pancakes!"

"Fried eggs!"

"Flat as Holland!"

But then, all of a sudden, a voice cut through the taunts.

"Leave her alone!" The room fell silent and everybody turned to look at who'd spoken. Lady J stepped forward from behind the group. Zoe couldn't believe it. A friend! "It's not her fault nobody likes her!" she continued.

The room broke into hysterical laughter as Lady J smirked, proud of her put-down. Zoe just stood there, looking at the floor, wishing that it would swallow her up. Fumbling to grab her bag, she turned her back on the crowd and walked away as steadily as she could. It took all her strength to keep her head held high.

xxoOoxx

Lunchtimes were the main problem. It was all very well sitting on your own in class, but lunchtime was a different story. That was when it was obvious that you were a Billy-no-mates. As she sat alone picking at her packed lunch, Zoe realized somebody had sat beside her.

"Hi Zoe."

His voice was enough to cause the butterflies in her stomach to start dancing.

"Oh, hiya, Dan." She struggled to sound cool but it was hard – it was Dan Morgan, after all.

"I heard what happened last week," he began, mumbling. "I mean, when those girls… the ones who are supposed to be your friends…"

Zoe felt the shame rising, turning her crimson and making her all hot.

"I think you did the right thing, ignoring it," Dan continued. "You don't need losers like them." He gave her a friendly punch on the arm, just like he used to. Suddenly Zoe felt herself relax.

"Thanks Dan," she smiled. It was the nicest thing she'd heard in months.

"Anyway," he continued, "now that I've got you on your own, I've been wanting to ask; why do you always ignore me these days? We used to have a laugh."

"Erm, I don't…" Zoe mumbled, embarrassed.

"You do!" he laughed. "And it's always when you're with those stuck-up cows who wear too much make-up!"

"OK, maybe I do a bit," Zoe admitted sheepishly.

"To make up for it I think a game of footie is in order. What do you reckon, Rooney?" he asked, poking Zoe in the ribs.

"Erm, OK. Although my shoes aren't really up to it!" Zoe lifted a high-heeled boot to show him.

"You're not getting out of it that easily! Borrow some of mine."

"But they stink!" Zoe teased, holding her nose and laughing. She realized that it was just like old times, with them messing around together – only this time it felt even better.

As they both stood up she spotted Melissa, Rachel and Kirsty watching from the canteen doorway in disbelief. The saddest girl in the class was talking, no, _flirting_ with Dan Morgan! They blocked the exit as the couple got nearer.

"Eggscuse me!" said Zoe loudly as she pushed through the barricade, with Dan following behind, his fingers playfully brushing the back of her arms. Zoe looked back at the three witches, relishing the expression on their horrified faces.

Now it was her turn to laugh.


End file.
